edit: This is all accurate, I think, except for the joke when I call myself sane.
I am back, sane and sober, and a bit startled. I decided that I needed to focus for a bit, that maybe I'd try for a bit every day or so to meditate, clear my mind of all fears and horrors, and really let my mind go. I sat in my room, my lights off, in what approximate I can do of the lotus position you always see. Having done no research into it, I just did what you always imagine for meditation. It was nice, really. I'm always so cluttered with thoughts, it makes it hard to sleep even when I'm not panicking about ole Gaunt or his agents.
I had to put out the sound of the neighbors upstairs stomping around, dogs outside, and cars on the street. I even hummed softly to myself as I relaxed. It was dizzying after a bit, I felt as if I was being pulled up and forward, just a few inches. Then I started to hear a rapping sound, like on my front door, so I stood and went out into the hallway. I don't usually get visitors, any of my few neighbors just try to sell me bootlegs. I guardedly went to the door, to see who was outside, when I noticed that it wasn't at my door, but my window. I've got a venetian blind by my comp that has a little ripped out of it, which until now didn't seem like an issue, but it's the right height for a pair of eyes to look in. I went to my table to get my replica katana I won in a game contest, and my phone, if it were an emergency.
I used the blade to push back the blinds, and saw a face looking back at me. Startled, I fell backwards tripping over my chair. It wasn't *him* but it was someone looking into my home! I scrambled to my feet, and out the front door to encircle the apartment. I saw him there, a ratty guy who had turned to face me, it was the same hobo from before...
Still blitzed mentally by the sudden shock, I talked to him hesitantly, saying approximately this.
Me>>> You! Whoa, sir, I don't have a lot of money.
Runner>>> You're the guy, right?
Me>>> Uhm...more specific? I talked to you the other day.
He came towards me, his hands before him, as if to grab me. I gestured to my sword as I tried to try to thumb dial the house phone for 911.
Runner>>> Being chased!
Me>>> Is that what this is about? The Sl....
I fumble over his name, still hesitant to call him by name.
Me>>> The monster, the thin monster. Is he here?
I cursed myself for leaving my kitchen extinguisher inside, as I looked around. The headlights of cars were flashing along the road beside my house, giving a strobe effect to the grounds.
Runner>>> He's too close, I gotta go
Me>>> Stay with me, I've got to know, I've got to see.
Runner>>> Spiders, I see them, even in my dreams
Me>>> Sir, come inside!
I pleaded with him, My heart threatened to burst out of my chest as I looked around for death, for him. Part of me hoped that at least I'd see him, just once before he got to me. Maybe then I'd be what the Sages are supposed to be.
I saw nothing.
Even when I looked back, the homeless gent was running. I took flight after him as best I could, but to no avail, my nightvision sucks, and he was fleeter than I had ever been.
Alright, he's gone but he still has a pursuer tonight. I headed back inside, got my extinguisher, put it in my good hand and went out to explore.
This monster was close at hand, and still no sign of him. I should've used my camera camcorder to look for him, though I doubt it'd show in the dark.
Even as irritated as I am that I missed my chance, my chance to stand against him, to try to conquer the fear that plagues me, I am concerned about that runner more. He came to me, I do not know if it were for help or blind...luck, but he was at my window, and he ran away in a panic.
I broke out the masking tape, putting up the symbol on my windows and walls, and recounted my weapons about the house. A broken bed leg is a decent cudgel, It'll be better when I carve the symbol on all its faces. I've got a Hypnotik bottle that is just right for blunt damage, and then there's the blade. It's not too sharp, but it'll do some damage, plus it's got reach. Aside my bed, I have glow in the dark tape, with a large pair of
looking across the room to the window.
I take a few deep breaths, focus myself again, and exhale. I imagine the room aglow in golden light, a precious safe light, and envision it to fill my home, and I am at peace for a bit longer.